HE’S A GOOD, GOOD FATHER!

By Sonya Camille

A good father is a blessing to his family, providing love, guidance, and support. While we often recognize the serious and important roles fathers play, there are also some interesting and lesser-known aspects that make them even more remarkable. So what makes for a “Good Father?” Here’s list numero uno that starts with the heavy absolute must-haves. Then, we’ll move on to list number 2. If you have everything on both lists, then Dad, you are indeed a Rock Star, and I can guarantee that your kids treat you as such. However, if you lack a few things on your list, don’t worry; get to work and know that your kids will recognize your efforts and hard work and cheer you on every step. It’s always possible to work on your relationships with the ones you love. They will not only meet you halfway but run with open arms to take the journey with you. You are worth the love they will give, and they are worth working hard on the relationship that you all desperately want. So here it is, list one on the good daddy list:

Good Father List 1:The Heavy

A Good Father Leads with Humility:

Contrary to popular belief, a good father doesn’t have to be the loudest voice in the room. In 1 Peter 5:5, we find the biblical guidance: “Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.'” A good father recognizes the importance of humility and leads his family with a gentle and humble spirit, creating an environment of respect and harmony.

A Good Father Values Quality Time:

One fun fact about a good father is his ability to prioritize quality time with his children. Ephesians 6:4 reads: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” A good father understands that spending quality time with his children is essential for their growth and nurtures a strong bond. Whether it’s playing games, having heartfelt conversations, or sharing hobbies, a good father cherishes these moments and works to create lasting memories with is children, regardless of their age.

A Good Father Demonstrates Patience:

Patience is a virtue that every good Father possesses. James 1:19 reminds us: “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” A good father understands that parenting requires patience and grace. He patiently listens to his children (even if their delivery isn’t exactly perfect), offers guidance with thoughtfulness, and handles challenging situations calmly and composedly. Above all a good father demonstrates self-control in the manner in which he communicates with his children.

A Good Father Encourages Individuality:

A good father recognizes and encourages the individuality of each of his children. Psalm 139:14 declares: “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” A good father celebrates his children’s unique gifts and talents, providing them with the support and encouragement to pursue their passions and dreams. He instills confidence and self-belief, helping his children realize their full potential.

A Good Father Teaches Life Skills:

A good father takes joy in teaching practical life skills to his children. Proverbs 22:6 advises: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Whether it’s teaching how to ride a bike, change a tire, cook a meal, or manage finances, a good father imparts invaluable skills that empower his children to navigate the world with confidence and competence.

Whew, that was heavy!  Now, for the side of dad that typically only his kids and a few select others see- the fun side! Yes, being a good father is a serious responsibility, but that doesn’t mean we can’t inject some humor and fun into our relationships also! Once you are actively working on mastering all of the heavy on list one, to be listed on the world’s best father list, you must also actively work on mastering the following on list two also. So, please sit back, relax, and prepare to chuckle as we delve into these delightful tidbits about a good father’s role. So here you go… on to list 2!

Good Father List 2:The Lighter Side

A Good Father Masters the Art of “Dad Jokes”:

One fun fact about a good father is his ability to crack cheesy yet endearing dad jokes. Remember Abraham in Genesis 17:5 when God changed his name to Abraham? Well, you could say that Abraham became the ultimate dad with a name like that – “Abra-ham it up”! Good fathers have a knack for lightening the mood and bringing laughter into the household, even if it means subjecting their kids to a few eye-rolling puns.

A Good Father Nails the “Dad Dance”:

When it comes to hitting the dance floor, a good father knows how to bust a move that embarrasses his kids while simultaneously earning their affection. Just like King David in 2 Samuel 6:14, who danced before the Lord with all his might, a good father isn’t afraid to let loose and showcase his unique dance style. Whether it’s the classic “dad shuffle” or an unexpected twist, his enthusiasm is contagious.

A Good Father Masters the “Invisible Chair” Pose:

Have you ever noticed how a good father can magically transform any space into a comfortable seat? It’s as if they possess the power to summon an invisible chair at will. Just like when Jesus multiplied the loaves and fishes to feed thousands (Matthew 14:13-21), a good father can make even the most uncomfortable situation feel cozy and secure. A Dad hug is the comfiest and most comforting, regardless of age or size.

A Good Father Excels at “Bedtime Storytelling”:

A good father has a natural talent for captivating storytelling, especially during bedtime routines. He can bring characters to life with animated voices and infuse suspense into every twist and turn. Just like Jesus captivating the crowds with parables, a good father can transport his children to imaginative worlds, leaving them eagerly anticipating the next chapter of their shared adventure.

A Good Father Perfects the “Dad Reflexes”:

We’ve all witnessed the extraordinary reflexes of a good father when it comes to catching falling objects or swiftly preventing accidents. It’s almost as if they possess superhero-like powers. Just like how Joseph protected Jesus and Mary by quickly heeding the angel’s warning to escape to Egypt (Matthew 2:13), a good father’s lightning-fast reflexes kick in when his children are in danger, ensuring their safety.

So, how many good lists, one and two good pops, are out there? No one is perfect, so don’t be too hard on yourself. The point is to recognize the area where you potentially need to grow and then start working on growing in those areas. Thats it!  If there is an area that requires you to communicate that you possibly may have slipped up and require an apology, then apologize. Don’t just try to ignore past wrongs or sweep “stuff” under the rug. That never works!  They remember, and your joking or acting like ‘stuff” wasn’t said or done doesn’t cover up the fact that you kinda did some wrong stuff, so swallow your pride and get it right. Clear the air, and then move on! 

Just as important as list one is, know that it is just as important to know how to laugh and love on the ones who love you most. Look, who wants to be around a stiff and boring dad? No one! And who wants to be around a negative and critical hot-head, trust me when I say, no one! A good father encompasses many qualities, and exploring the fun facts about their roles and characteristics enhances our understanding of their impact on their family’s lives. From leading with humility and valuing quality time to demonstrating patience, encouraging individuality, teaching life skills, laughing, being positive, encouraging a good dancer, having patience and self-control, to being a great communicator, all of these aspects make a good father exceptional. 

Being a good father is no easy task, but it doesn’t mean we can’t appreciate the lighter side of their role either. From mastering “dad jokes” and rocking the “dad dance” to perfecting the “invisible chair” pose, excelling at bedtime storytelling, and showcasing impressive “dad reflexes,” good fathers bring joy, laughter, and a sense of security into their kids lives and into their home! So, this Father’s Day, let’s celebrate our good fathers and appreciate their unique abilities to blend humor, love, and guidance in a way that leaves an indelible mark on their children’s hearts. And let’s reflect on these insights from the Bible, so we can appreciate and celebrate the diverse facets that contribute to the joy and significance of a good father’s role in the lives of his children.

I am so thankful for my husband, my children’s “good father!” And, although I generally cringe when someone says this today, I find it appropriate to say that I love my baby’s daddy, my children’s good Father, my husband of 30 years, and my one and only boyfriend since I was 17 years old. I love him for all that he is, all that he has done, and all that he continues to do for our family. HE IS EVERYTHING to us, and I honor and celebrate you today, Jerrold! We love you so much! I am so thankful that our Heavenly Father, our truly good, good Father, chose you to be mine and the Father of our babies. I am eternally grateful! HE IS TRULY SO, SO GOOD!

Happy Father’s Day to all of the Good Fathers out there!

 SONG LINK: https://youtu.be/t4MoLsXClEk

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My Father’s Eyes

By Sonya Camille

You know, as a little girl, I was often told that I looked just like my Father and that my sister looked more like my Mother. Most based their assessments on complexion alone because, as you know, our society is driven by colorism-light v. dark. I’m sure most people of color would agree that this is beyond annoying in that it is still an ongoing issue to this day. As not to dive too deep into this on this post, let me provide a bit of context to readers who may not know what I am referring to. See, in America, this brought from slavery nonsense was used to pit slave brothers against each other, and sadly, they were successful in doing so. Lighter-complexion negroes, howbeit still enslaved and mistreated, were treated better and given better jobs out of the heat inside or around the master’s house. Sadly, this is yet another deep and dark aspect of our complex American history. But, colorism affects many cultures where their citizens also bear a diverse array of multi-melanated people. In each case, this sad truth is consistent, the lighter your complexion, the more socially accepted you are. But, look, that’s a different discussion for another day. As for now, I’m just pointing out that since my Dad’s complexion was browner than my Mother’s, and since my skin tone was closer to that of my dad’s, I was often told that I looked like him. Conversely, my less melanated sister was told she looked more like my mama since her complexion resembled our mother’s.

Interestingly enough, I look more like my Mother than my sister, although Mom, aka Donnie, is all up in both of us. And Daddy, aka Allen, is all up in there as well. So there is no denying that the Mingo and Prewitt/Sanford genes are in us. That is who we are, Allen and Donnie’s girls!

People have consistently stated that I have my Father’s eyes. That compliment always made me smile, especially when I was told that as an adult. I smiled because I knew those eyes, and I knew all that those eyes had seen and done. So to me, that was a high compliment!

A funny thing people often told me when I was younger was, “You have your dad’s eyes, a cross between your mom and dad’s nose, your mom’s facial structure and chin, and your dad’s flat face.” As a kid, all I could do was nod and smile. I had no idea what else I could say to that one except…. umm, “thank you?” But that’s what I heard, and although interesting, that was their opinion. Pushing past the comments said about my apparent flat face and nose, they said that I had my father’s eyes, and that is the topic of this post today- My Father’s eyes. 

It has been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul. In the case of all of our fathers, our eyes hold a special connection to our biological fathers because of the genetic legacy that was passed down to us from our daddies. However, there is a deeper meaning behind our eyes, one that extends beyond our earthly lineage. As I explored the significance of “my own father’s eyes,” meaning Allen Mingo’s eyes as passed down to me genetically, I couldn’t help but draw a parallel between our physical eyes as given to us by our dads and our spiritual eyes as we reflect the image of our heavenly Father and creator. I also couldn’t help but remember a song that often played on our local Christian radio station WFRN. The very 1980-ish song “Father’s Eyes” by Amy Grant was one of the most requested songs on this station. And since this station was all that my parents listened to other than a few other Christian records, I heard it often.

Random side note here. Do you all remember back in the day when you called your local station and requested a song? My goodness, it’s interesting the things you remember from childhood that now seem like ancient history. But anyway, I found the song I’m referring to on YouTube and I have to tell you, it sounds older than what even I remember, but it still stirred the same sense of emotion that it did back then. As sung in this song, I too want my Father’s eyes, and you should want your’s too! I attached the link below, so please go check it out.

-DADDY’S EYES vs. GOD’S EYES-

Biological Inheritance: The Eyes of Our Fathers:

Our physical eyes remind us of our biological connection with our fathers. From eye color to specific characteristics, we often inherit these traits from our earthly fathers. Psalm 16:8 reflects this connection: “I keep my eyes always on the LORD. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.” Just as our physical eyes are shaped by our fathers, our spiritual vision should be shaped by our heavenly Father.

Reflecting Our Heavenly Father’s Image:

While our physical eyes may resemble our earthly fathers, our spiritual vision should mirror the attributes and character of our heavenly Father. In Genesis 1:27, we read, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God, he created them; male and female he created them.” As children of God, we are called to reflect His image in our thoughts, actions, and attitudes. Our eyes should perceive the world through the lens of love, grace, compassion, and righteousness.

Honoring and Respecting Our Heavenly Father:

Just as we honor and respect our earthly fathers, we should give the same reverence to our heavenly Father. In Matthew 6:9, Jesus teaches us how to pray, saying, “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.” This verse shows that we should honor and revere our heavenly Father, acknowledging His supreme authority and holiness. By living lives that reflect His character, we honor Him and bring glory to His name.

Seeking God’s Perspective:

Our physical eyes allow us to perceive the world around us, but our spiritual eyes enable us to see things from God’s perspective. Psalm 119:18 expresses this desire, “Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law.” When we seek God’s perspective through His Word and prayer, our spiritual eyes are opened to discern His will, understand His truths, and navigate life according to His divine wisdom.

Representing Our Heavenly Father:

As children of God, we are called to represent our heavenly Father in all aspects of our lives. In 2 Corinthians 5:20, Paul writes, “Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us.” Our eyes should reflect God’s love, grace, and mercy to the world, serving as a testimony of His transformative power in our lives. By living in a manner that honors and represents our heavenly Father, we become His ambassadors, shining His light in a dark world.

My Dads Eyes

My daddy’s eyes were not perfect, but they were perfect for me and my sister Chanda. Through his eyes, we saw a love for God that was unwavering. We saw a love for my Mother that, although challenged before he gave his life to Christ, was solid from the point that they both gave their lives to Jesus moving forward. Dad’s deep love, connection, and commitment to my mother continued until Jesus called my mother home to heaven. Through my Dad’s eyes, we saw an example of a real man who loved, protected, and provided for his family. Through his eyes, we saw a man impart wisdom and guidance to his children and grandchildren. Walking past his study at night, by the dim light on his desk, we saw his eyes shut and heard him quietly praying for each of us. Through his eyes, we saw strength, drive, determination, an out-of-this-world work ethic, and a love for his parents and family. His eyes had joy and laughter in them as he joked, laughed often, and joyously and loudly sang all kinds of songs around the house. Dad’s eyes were fun. He would invent ways to keep us entertained. Mimicking many of the adventurous things he once did as a child and introducing my sister and me, along with whichever cousins were visiting at the time to pure, imaginative country fun! He was the best! We saw adventure in his eyes as he was a great storyteller. We saw grief in those eyes as he said goodbye to my mother. We saw him faithfully preach and pour into the lives of many-including those in our local jail, through his jail ministry. Through his eyes, we saw what a true man of God looked like.

While our physical eyes bear the resemblance of our earthly fathers, it is what we see through our spiritual eyes that truly matters. What does that mean exactly? Well, we should all strive to reflect the image of our heavenly Father by honoring Him, respecting Him, and representing Him in all that we say and do. You see, our eyes should become a conduit for God’s love and truth. Each day, it should be our desire to seek God’s perspective, represent Him faithfully, and live in a way that aligns with His character. 

But this, my friends, is only if God is your Heavenly Father. Is He? Do you know? You only can have God’s eyes if He is your Father and if you know and acknowledge Him as your Lord and Savior. If you have confessed with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead-then, you know Him, and it is His eyes that you now have! 

Romans 10:9,10 says: “If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.”

So, let us fix our eyes on our heavenly Father and allow His image to shine through our eyes, impacting the world around us for His glory!

Happy Father’s Day to all the great Fathers out there! And a very special Happy Father’s Day to my dad, Allen Mingo. You did Daddy well, and I honor you today!

Cordially, Your youngest, Sonya Camille 🤍

Song: My Father’s Eyes

Link: https://youtu.be/lGBLgJnORx8

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The Art of Culture by Schuyler Elliot

Guest Writer:

By Schuyler Elliot

“Culture is all around us, it’s intangible; you can feel it, you can smell it, and you can hear it. Culture is the ultimate influencer that drives our motives, intentions, and actions as a society. It’s who we are, what we do, and where we belong. Our world and society are both built on different cultures from our heritage and ethnic backgrounds, but there is also a social culture that drives our motives, our way of life, how we do things, and what we value.

Culture is a beautiful concept when used to set the tone for a positive environment that produces harmony, change, and, ultimately, a culture that serves our Lord. Our universe was created by a God who loves culture, the culture to live in freedom, to serve those around us, and to ultimately worship Him.

But what happens when the power to control “culture” is in the hands of the wrong individuals and leaders? Chaos? Fear? A fallen society? We currently live in a lost society where every individual is searching for identity at every corner, forgetting the fact that we have already been given an identity, an identity with purpose, drive, contentment, and excitement.

We constantly speak of a culture that has gone “downhill,” a generation that is “lost.” But what we fail to realize is that the wholesome culture we once knew is still there, but we are the ones who have walked away from the lives we were created to live. A culture of unity, identity, power, love, and integrity. Not a culture of confusion, isolation, devastation, and separation.

It was us. No one forced us to change our ways, our habits, or our mindset; we did it on our own because we thought a world without Christ was better than a world that relied on a Savior who came to save us all. We took His light for granted and exchanged it for our own darkness.

We see that our culture has destroyed principles that were created to keep us following after Christ and allow us to truly live a life of freedom and abundance. Free from the chains that weigh us down through our own daily struggles and battles. We forget that our war has already been won.

We have been manipulated into thinking that “our way” is the best way to live; we have failed to open our eyes and see that the decline in our own society and community isn’t anyone’s fault but our own. We have failed to see that we are to blame. We hold the power to kill the culture that the world has enforced on us. Not only do we have the power to kill it, but we are called to; it’s our mission because we are called to answer and join the great commission.

Most of us live in fear, afraid to ruffle feathers when deciding to speak up, but it’s because most of us have gotten too comfortable with silence. After all, we have been beaten into submission by way of silence. For things to change, it all starts with us realizing that war is inevitable for a society that is at odds.

Culture is an art that we have the power to control, we have the authority to set the tone of our society in an attempt to get us closer to the lives we were created to live, but it starts with the change within ourselves first.”

Take a peek at my interview with Schuyler Elliot as we dive into “Killing the Culture” Tap the link below!

Host of “The Kill Culture Podcast” Streaming on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, and YouTube.

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THE POTTERS HANDS

By Sonya Camille

I’ve always wanted to try my hand at pottery (pun intended). It looked easy enough to me. You get a ball of clay, place it on a wheel, press the pedal to initiate the transformation process, and then start making something. Well, nothing could be further from reality. Preparing the clay well before you place the well-formed ball on the wheel involves prep work. First, you must carefully apply firm yet gentle pressure to your clay before forming it. Then, there is a technique involved in carefully molding the delicate clay. This technique must be carefully followed to form your piece correctly. The “technique” must be followed all while keeping the clay moist with water. I’m bustin’ a bit of knowledge to y’all right now. Yup, I’m flexin’ a bit as all of this new knowledge was acquired from my first pottery class just last week. I’m a fast learner, and I listened so well that I’m basically a pro now (insert laugh).

My kids surprised me for Mother’s Day with the most thoughtful and beautiful gifts. Brunch, a three-hour pottery class, and precious time with my forever babies, now young adult children, were my gifts for Mother’s Day. It was truly the best gift ever! I enjoyed learning and laughing, and this last one may surprise you. I enjoyed the relaxation element as well. Soft music playing in the distance or just the soft whistle from the spinning wheel was a welcomed stillness. I sat and formed my pottery only with my thoughts and maybe a gentle California breeze coming in through a nearby open window or door to keep the company of my thoughts. I was there with my two no longer little loves. We sat together and formed our clay. Quietly, each in our thoughts and enjoying the still moments we experienced together, all while sitting next to the ones we love most. It was indeed sweet and relaxing! So relaxing and so enjoyable that I promised myself I would have an art room in my next house. Call it my new empty nester, middle-aged obsession, and I couldn’t be more thrilled!

Throughout history, pottery has symbolized craftsmanship, creativity, and human ingenuity. The delicate art of molding clay into beautiful vessels and sculptures has captivated cultures across the globe. However, beyond its aesthetic appeal, pottery holds profound spiritual significance that resonates with ancient texts, and the Bible. I find the biblical metaphor of the Potter and the Clay beautiful and fascinating. The symbolism revealed a loving picture and many profound truths through its depiction of the relationship between God and His children.

 Potter and the Clay 

As I explored the symbolism a bit more closely, this is what I discovered. I’ll call it my 5-Point Biblical Reflection on Divine Design. A big title that simply means the five things I discovered about the metaphor of God and man as it relates to the potter and clay. I hope you find it as fascinating as I did.

5-Point Biblical Reflection on Divine Design.

  1. The Divine Potter:
  • In the book of Jeremiah, we encounter an interesting analogy of God as the Potter and humanity as the clay. In Jeremiah 18:6, God instructs the prophet, saying, “Can I not do with you as this potter does?” This imagery emphasizes that God, who has the final authority in each of our lives, like a skilled potter, has the power to shape and mold our lives according to His divine plan.

2. The Moldable Clay:

  • Just as clay is pliable in the hands of a potter, we, as human beings, are called to be receptive to God’s transformative work in our lives. The Bible often talks about people as clay that constantly needs shaping and refinement. Isaiah 64:8 states, “But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand.” This acknowledgment invites us to surrender our wills to God and allow Him to mold us into vessels that reflect His purpose and character.

3. The Process of Shaping:

  • Pottery-making involves carefully preparing, molding, and firing the clay to create a final masterpiece. Similarly, God’s work in our lives is a journey that requires our active participation. As the Potter, God tenderly molds and shapes us through various life experiences, challenges, and triumphs. These shaping moments, although at times painful, serve to refine our character, strengthen our faith, and align us with God’s purposes.

4. Embracing Imperfection:

  • Pottery is rarely perfect. It may have minor and sometimes significant flaws, imperfections, or irregularities that are an inherent part of the creative process. Likewise, as clay crafted by God’s hands, we are not exempt from imperfection. Just remember, it is through our weaknesses and vulnerabilities that God’s strength is made perfect in us(2 Corinthians 12:9). We are reminded that God uses flawed people to showcase His glory, revealing His transformative power in human frailty.

5. Yielding to the Divine Design:

  • As we surrender ourselves to God’s loving hands, we must trust in His wisdom and divine design for our lives. Just as a potter crafts the clay with specific purposes in mind, God has a unique plan for each one of us. We should resist the temptation to resist or question God’s work but instead embrace the beauty of His craftsmanship unfolding within us.

I remember sitting in church listening to the choir sing “Potter’s House.” It was one of my favorite songs; the words always stuck with me. The first verse immediately caught your attention with the words, “In case your situation has turned upside down, and all your dreams are shattered, and you’re all broken inside. You don’t have to stay in the shape that you’re in because the Potter wants to put you back together again.” (see the link below to listen to this song) I always pictured God the Potter sitting at his heavenly wheel, molding a piece of muddy, slightly messy clay. The clay, of course, is meant to symbolize you and me. We are a broken, messed up people. We are a people plagued with depression, anxiety, sickness, mental health challenges, addictions, and brokenness. We are in a world where relationship problems in our homes, on our jobs, with our children, and between husband and wife are prevalent. Where divorce, financial struggles, war, climate change issues, government breakdown, and world issues stress most. As a society, we are confused, scared, and more lonely than ever. There is abuse, extreme, unexplained violence, and unrest everywhere. We worry about our safety, our children’s safety, tomorrow’s stock prices, and our lack of knowledge on what’s to come. As a country, we are more in debt and can afford less. We are unhealthy, status-driven, money-hungry, and fearful, and statistics show that over 90% of Americans have this overwhelming sense that something is terribly wrong in our country and our world. Face it, we are, as a world, in desperate need of a loving Savior! We need help, and we need it now!

I have good news for you; there is someone who can mend all of the broken, messed up pieces of our life. His name is Jesus! I’m here to tell you that He can take your deformed, colorless, messy ball of clay life and mold it into a beautiful masterpiece. He can save you if you simply cry out to Him and ask Him. I’m so happy that God can mold our ugly broken pieces of life and smooth out all the bumps and bruises we sustain in this life. He can lovingly put us back together again. He is the Potter, my friends, and we are the clay! 

The Potter and the Clay metaphor serves as a profound reminder of our relationship with God. It highlights His sovereignty, creativity, and transformative power in our lives. As we yield to His molding, we can experience the joy of becoming vessels that reflect His love, grace, and purpose. So, may we embrace our role as clay in the Potter’s hands, trusting in His perfect design and finding fulfillment in becoming vessels that bring glory to Him. Won’t you trust Him with your life today? It doesn’t matter what you have done, your background, what your mother did, what your Father did, how far you have wandered away from God, or what was done to you. He, your Heavenly Father, is lovingly waiting to put you back together again. I’ll say it again; the Potter wants to put you back together again! 

If you want more information on how Jesus can help change your life, situation, family, and future, please email me at sonyacamillecontact@gmail.com, and I will gladly send you more information.

-SONG LINK: The Potter’s House:

https://youtu.be/lus2TR_Qy6E

-Biblical Reference: Jeremiah 18:6 – “Can I not do with you as this potter does?” declares the Lord.

Biblical Reference: Isaiah 64:8- “But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our Potter; we are all the work of your hand.”

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My Motherless Mother’s Day- I Miss Her

 Finding Healing and Strength After Loss

By Sonya Camille

So, this is my third Mother’s Day without my sweet mama. I shy away from thoughts that it’s getting better but rather celebrate that I’m improving. I’m better in that instead of tears; my heart only drops slightly at the thought of not having Mom here with me. Instead of hyperventilating while crying, warm tears quietly roll down my cheeks when I see something or hear something that reminds me of her. Oh, how I miss her! Her absence is felt everywhere, and the void she left is deep and hollow. 

The other day while having brunch with a group of my girlfriends, I noticed a mother and daughter sitting at a table adjacent to ours. The mother appeared to be the approximate age my mother would be if she were still here, and the daughter seemed to be my age as well. I couldn’t help but keep looking at them. I pictured my mother sitting there. My mom was always well dressed and classy, her nails done, her hair gorgeous, and she had the most amazing and dynamite smile imaginable. Seeing the mother/daughter smile and laugh made me smile, but it saddened me also. Why? Because I knew my mom loved being with me. Mom loved going places with me, hanging out with the family and me, and she loved talking to me several times each day. She always made me feel that whatever I spoke to her about was the most interesting, and she never missed an opportunity to affirm and encourage me. She loved everything about her family, and I know she would have loved being at that beautiful restaurant with me, enjoying brunch and engaging in whatever conversation she and I would have had. That thought is what made my eyes fill up with tears. She loved life, and I loved her being in my life. 

I was so engrossed in watching that I wasn’t present in my conversation with my sweet friends. So I had to make it up to them by treating them to coffee the following week. They knew what I was thinking or had an idea, and I’m sure they saw my tear-filled eyes, so they showed me grace and love as they knew by the look on my face that I was definitely having a moment. 

While watching, I struggled a bit to keep my thoughts under control. Feelings of “it’s not fair” itis kept trying to invade my thoughts. Even still, I did resist the urge to utter the words or ideas that it was not fair that my mother wasn’t with me when she was such an amazing mother and grandmother. I fight that thought and toss it out whenever it even comes close to knocking on my thought door. 2 Corinthians 10:5b says, “Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” As this scripture suggests, keeping those thoughts in captivity is genuinely an act of discipline and mental toughness. How foolish of me to ever begin to have such thoughts when I know my God and believe wholeheartedly that His ways are far above mine and His thoughts are beyond anything I could ever comprehend. That said, God fulfilled His will for my mother’s life. His will for my mother’s life in calling her home at such an early age caused me sadness here on earth, but it was His will. Although I don’t understand, I choose to trust Him and put my faith in Him because He has never failed me or let me down. He’s faithful through every season, so why would he fail now…just as the song (see link below)says, HE WON’T! I truly do have a peace that makes no sense, and I know that, that my friend is God!

Mother’s Day is a bittersweet occasion for those who have lost their mothers. While the world around us celebrates the joy and love of motherhood, we may find ourselves grappling with a profound sense of loss and grief. However, even amid the pain, we can honor our mothers’ memory and find solace by embracing our mental health, seeking therapy, and drawing strength from God’s Word.

5 Gentle Reminders

1. Embracing Grief and Mental Health: The loss of a mother is an indescribable sorrow that can profoundly impact our mental health. It is crucial to acknowledge and embrace our grief instead of suppressing it. Allow yourself times to mourn, to cry, and to remember. Acknowledge that it is okay to feel a mix of emotions on Mother’s Day—sadness, anger, nostalgia, and even moments of happiness. Give yourself permission to grieve in your own way, and remember that healing is a gradual and unique process for each individual.

2. The Power of Therapy: During times of grief, seeking therapy can be immensely beneficial. Therapy provides a safe space to express our emotions, explore our thoughts, and develop coping strategies. Professional therapists can guide us through the grieving process, help us navigate complex emotions, and provide valuable tools to manage our mental health. They can also assist in identifying any unresolved issues that may arise after a mother’s passing and support us in finding healthy ways to address them.

3. Reflecting on Biblical Teachings: The Bible offers comforting words and wisdom for those experiencing loss and grief. Scriptures can provide solace and strength as we navigate Mother’s Day without our mothers. Psalm 34:18, it states, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” This reminder assures us that we are not alone in our pain and that God is present in our sorrow, offering comfort and healing.

4. Celebrating the Legacy: Though our mothers may no longer be physically present, their legacy continues to live on within us. Take this Mother’s Day as an opportunity to honor their memory by celebrating the qualities they instilled in us—their love, kindness, strength, and resilience. Engage in activities that were dear to your mother’s heart, or that you shared together, such as cooking her favorite meal, visiting her favorite place, or engaging in a hobby, she enjoyed. This act of remembrance can bring solace and a sense of connection.

5. Connecting with Others: Sharing your feelings and memories with others who have experienced a similar loss can be profoundly comforting. Seek to find support groups or online communities where individuals who have lost their mothers gather to share their experiences. These spaces provide a sense of belonging and understanding, reminding us that we are not alone in our grief. Opening up about our emotions and stories can foster healing and offer valuable insights into navigating this journey.

Honoring Mother’s Day after the passing of our mothers may seem challenging, but it is possible to find healing, strength, and solace. Embracing our mental health, seeking therapy, finding comfort in the Biblical teachings of God’s Word, celebrating our mothers’ legacies, and connecting with others who share similar experiences are all essential components of this healing process. Remember, while our mothers may no longer be with us physically, their love and influence endure within us, guiding us through life’s challenges. May this Mother’s Day be an opportunity to reflect, heal, and cherish the memories we hold dear.

Llink To Song: https://youtu.be/uOP4s8fOEm0

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