Cordially Camille

Fitness

So stick with me as I take the long route to get to the topic of fitness-the really, really long route where you start thinking, “Are we ever going to get there?” kind of long route, so here we go. As if having a mastectomy and complete reconstruction on my breast (which my hubby loves btw) wasn’t enough, about three years ago, I had to have a complete hysterectomy. 

Real talk here; admittedly, I do like the fact that I no longer have cycles. I am also digging not having the need to have annual pelvic exams- Such a wonderful gift. But when they said I would immediately go into menopause once the hysterectomy was complete-Honey, they were not lying!

Listen, friends, I’m actually one of the lucky ones. Other than periodic, relatively mild hot flashes and a few different, shall I say, menopause-isms, this menopause thing isn’t really that bad.
Menopause confessions here-
1. I keep the temperature of our house at almost below freezing temperatures (because I’m always hot yall).
2. I wear tank tops or sleeveless shirts because long sleeves make me feel claustrophobic during one of my blasted hot flashes. Layers are a must!
3. I need to sleep with a fan blowing on my face and body every night. Even I admit that the whole temperature thing is a bit bizarre. Bizarre to me because my house feels like what you would assume the temperature of an igloo to be-super cold. The reason why I still need a fan is a mystery to me, also. All I can say is as cold as it may be, the cold air blowing on my face feels great. Correction, it feels better than great! The temperature of the house and the cold fan does freeze my poor husband, but man, it keeps me really comfortable. And being comfortable while going through this whole menopause thing is the goal, folks. 

Another confession since I’m on a roll here telling all my business is that my body temperature constantly fluctuates. I’m cold, then I’m hot. I have a normal and comfortable body temperature until, without warning, my body temperature changes, and then, I feel like my insides are cooking, and I’m no longer comfortable. Friends, it truly is a whole thing. I’m hot until I get too cold. Then I snuggle into my husband until I get hot again. This body temperature see-saw continues until morning. Cold then hot until I throw the covers off myself and move closer to the fan until I get too cold again, and the cycle repeats itself.
4. If I’m being honest, I have to say I have a much shorter fuse lately. I have zero tolerance for drama or foolishness-zero! I can smell drama, an attitude, or an issue from miles away and run from it as fast as I can. If you bring drama to me, I will likely smile and then dismiss myself but know you have been marked. Joking but not joking! I’m not giving you what you want- which is my participation. No, thank you! Not interested!
5. Also, there’s the excessive hair-shedding thing. Thank God I have many strands to spare, so, so far, it isn’t an issue. I am, however, more intentional about my hair care routine now because I’m really not trying to have any hair issues if I can help it.
6. The dry skin is rather annoying. Shea butter is my new jam! I love it so much that I am selling my favorite shea butter on my online store for you all to try out. It’s life to my skin! I can’t wait to share this with you.
7. Now for the ism that drives me the most bonkers-the bubble upper hormonal tummy thing (like seriously, what is that?). The upper tummy is truly the most annoying menopause-ism of all.
With only seven things on my list of menopause-ism, you can see why I say I’m thankful that I don’t have many menopausal woes to announce. I know it could be much worse, so I’ll gladly take what I’ve been given. God is good!

All of that brings me to this post’s intended topic: fitness. So let’s talk about the middle age menopausal stomach bubble. Then let’s talk about my plan to pop said tummy bubble and try my best to get my flat pre-meno stomach back, shall we? So, I was given the gift of a tummy tuck at the time of my breast reconstruction, which was pretty awesome. Although I pray you’ll never have to go through what I had to go through to get said tummy tuck, that was no fun at all. Now that the dust has settled and my stage 0 Ductal Carcinoma Insitu breast cancer is a thing of the past. I can truly say that I love my flat lower belly. Until my hysterectomy, my upper and lower stomach were completely flat-I felt like a baddie!

Since the Delivered 50 series launch, I have and will continue to document my quest to shed 50 pounds this year- if that’s even possible. Shedding 50 pounds is my goal, but I’m ok if I fall short a pound or 10. Fifty seemed to fit the theme, so we’ll go with that. However, if this blasted upper tummy doesn’t vanish this year, I will document my consultation with a plastic surgeon… just saying!

Delivered 50 Fitness Journey-To be continued… Cordially, of course!

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CORDIALLY FRIENDS 7 Day Outfits

Cordially, Friends & Cordially, Fresh is a by-invitation-only special feature on the Cordially Camille Blog. C-Friends & C-Fresh were both created to celebrate the beauty and diversity of the community, which the Cordially Camille blog embodies.

Our C-Friends will showcase seven outfits they would wear in a typical week, while our C-Fresh will share their daily skincare routine with all of us. Both will highlight products and share their skin care tips and advice with the Cordially Camille community. This special corner of this blog is a fun space for friends to celebrate friends in love & always Cordially 🤍

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I had my son pack too much for his Missions Trip To Mexico. Signed, A Chronic Over-Packer!

THE MISSIONS TRIP

So, my 23-year-old law student took a week off of school to go on a week-long missions trip to Chiapas, Mexico. My kids have always expressed an interest in going on mission trips, but due to their rigorous athletic and training schedules throughout high school, we could never find one that worked with their schedule. I guess there were a few opportunities for them to go to the “inner city” to minister with a youth group they attended while in high school. Unfortunately, my husband and I didn’t allow our children to go with the group for a good reason. This topic would be an excellent discussion to dive into in a later post or on my (Call Me Camille) podcast. The title would likely be something like this, “Why I refused to allow my black children to minister with (great people) but a predominately white youth group to the predominantly black, mostly minority, inner-city.” Or perhaps this title. “Why I did not allow my children to go on a missions trip with wonderful Christians who hardly, if ever, had any interaction with blacks and minorities in their communities.” 

I grew up in a Christian home, attended a Christian school, and attended the world’s most prominent Christian, non-Catholic, University. So, I have seen it all! I saw the pictures and heard the conversations centered around the mission trips to the inner city and Africa. I listened to the many discussions about how and I quote, “good it feels to help “save” the blacks in the inner-city and Africa because, man, they need it!” Well-meaning Christians who loved showing off their pictures of, or pictures with little, dirty, poor black babies, locals, and children. If I am being honest, I never liked the comments, nor did I like the photos. And whenever I see pictures or unbelievably sad commercials that show half-naked, dirty children walking on dirt roads in some third-world country, it makes me shake my head. You know, the commercial that plays the same sad music as the Sarah McLachlan SPCA save the animals commercials. The same commercials where you are asked to donate just pennies a day to save a helpless animal and feed said animal for a year. Well, that one! Admittedly, I remember the conversations and the commercials like the one I just described, and it’s still a source of irritation to me. But, it was sincere, authentic, and raw conversations- like this one- about God’s view on missions, His plan, purpose, and everything else in between on the subject of service to God and others through mission work that we had in our home. 

In our house, we discussed it all, and I know that it was also a source of discussion in many black homes. I know this because although we rarely spoke about this publicly or in private, it was a conversation we often discussed among ourselves. 

As a teenager, in my home, similar discussions were had regarding mission trips. For the same reasons, and perhaps for reasons my parents chose not to disclose, my dad would not allow me to go on mission trips to predominately under-resourced minority areas either. I’ll have him on the Pod to share his thoughts on this subject in the future. ALL people, regardless of their skin color or social-economic status, need to hear the Gospel. I wish someone would have organized a mission trip to my affluent suburban community or organized a group to minister and serve the children and families in my predominately white executive neighborhood. They need Jesus too! 

As a family, we have a sincere heart for everyone of every ethnicity. We have compassion for the poor and know what God’s Word says about the poor, needy, and hungry. We know what our responsibility as Christians is to them, and it is an honor to serve others. Just so we are clear, I know that many hearts are in the right place and that the intentions of many are, in fact, honorable, but the actions toward your neighbor once you return home speak louder than words or the photos that were shown. Many of my caucasian brothers and sisters may not fully understand what I have just shared; however, it is how many black Christians feel. It is uncomfortable, but I feel that we all can grow through honest conversation and transparency-Don’t you?

I was going to save this conversation for a later day, but since I’m already knee-deep in this, I should also add that my current (predominately white) church, by their actions, seems to get it! This year, because that’s how long I’ve attended this particular church, I have witnessed them being intentional about their ministry within the community without focusing on any specific demographic. Serving the people, ALL of the people, in their community was their focus. That’s what it’s all about! And I have to tell you, being a part of this was incredibly refreshing to me! They get it!

Wow, I digressed! So, where were we? In high school, my son went on a trip with his basketball team, where they participated in several “service/community outreach” events. At the same time, they toured the South and visited many Division I colleges. It was a service, vacation, tour combo, if you will. So, that trip wasn’t quite a missions trip, but it was as close as he got to go on a mission trip. Speaking of service, my children were actively involved in our Chicago west suburban chapter of Jack and Jill. The Jack and Jill of America Inc. organization. Jack and Jill of America, Inc is a membership organization of mothers and children dedicated to nurturing future African-American leaders by strengthening children through leadership development, volunteer service, philanthropic giving, and civic duty. There, they participated in many community service outreach events and programs. Serving others and giving back to their community is in our DNA, but they have never participated in an actual mission trip. So, although only my son Jay attended, this trip to Mexico was an incredible experience for all of us. Admittedly, I was just as excited as my son. This leads me to the more significant issue here: my packing.

I NEED HELP!

So, let’s talk about my packing issues-I need help y’all! No matter how hard I try, I can not condense everything I need into an appropriately sized suitcase. I often find it hard to get everything I need into a bag weighing less than 50lbs. It’s a struggle. 

My poor son looked at me sideways (respectfully) as I kept bringing him things to add to his bag. But, before you judge, you must know that I pack for the “what-ifs.” I pack for the ” just in case” and the “if I need it and can’t find a place to buy it, no worries; I got you” moments. I have to pack those things for my own peace of mind, but I also need to pack my other essential items while adhering to the airline weight requirements- and that’s where you come in!

I would love to hear from you. Please email me @sonyacamillecontact@gmail.com with any packing suggestions or tips you would like to share with me. Then, come back for the second half of this post entitled “Packing solutions-what I’ve learned.” I will incorporate your feedback and my research from Pinterest and YouTube, and hopefully, I will get tips on how to pack more efficiently. Packing tips are coming soon here on Cordially Camille! 

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED OVER THE PAST
50 YEARS

The Incomplete List of the
THINGS I’VE LEARNED OVER THE PAST
50 YEARS

50! FIFTY! Fiff…tyyyy! The BIG 5-0! Look, no matter how you look at it and no matter how you say it, 50 is half of 100. I have been blessed to make 50 long trips around the sun; wow! I’m 50. I’m actually 50. How absolutely & wonderfully unbelievable! Let’s GO!

I know what the numbers look like, but all I can say is that I truly do not feel as vintage as my age suggests. As far as my birthday, it was truly magical! I had the most amazing celebration with my family and dear friends! Truly a weekend of thoughtful, well-planned activities, sweet memories made, and special surprises. The calls, the messages, the cards, the gifts, the flowers, and the many hugs all made my special day just that much more memorable. My heart was full (still is), and I’m pretty sure I didn’t stop smiling all day long. My family, the people who love me the most in this world, went out of their way to make me feel like a well-loved vintage princess, and I appreciate them more than words can express.

In celebration of my 50th birthday, I thought I would share 50 truths with you that I have learned in my now half of 100 years on planet earth. Here we go, in no specific order!

MY 50 TRUTHS, LIFE LESSONS
& the incomplete list of the
THINGS I’VE LEARNED OVER THE PAST
50 YEARS

  1. The #1 truth I’ve learned over the past 50 years is that Jesus Christ is the way, the
    truth, and the life. He died on the cross for my sins, was buried, and rose again on the
    third day. The only way to heaven is by accepting God’s gift of salvation through the shed blood
    of his son, Jesus Christ, on Calvary’s tree. By faith, you are saved and not by any good deeds. You can not earn your way into heaven.
  2. Second only to my relationship with Jesus, my husband, and my two children are literally my everything!
    Protect your family physically, mentally, and spiritually at all costs.
  3. Loyalty among family is a must! If you’re not loyal, then I can’t trust you. If I can’t trust
    you, then you’re not truly family.
  4. When people, even extended family members, show you who they are, believe them!
  5. Life is too short to get hung up on petty and trivial things.
  6. Faith always over fear.
  7. Worship is essential to my relationship with God.
  8. Laughter truly is contagious.
  9. Nothing is ever guaranteed.
  10. You can’t control what happens, but you can control your reaction to what happens.
  11. Someone is always better and worse than you.
  12. In literally everything, give thanks and have a spirit of gratitude.
  13. “Death and life lie in the power of the tongue.” You can not take your words back, So
    choose your words wisely.
  14. In little or in much, learn to be content.
  15. You create the life you live by the choices you make. So make good choices.
  16. Love yourself, even your flaws.
  17. Pray literally without ceasing.
  18. A soft answer truly does turn away anger and believe scripture when it says that
    grievous words stir up anger.
  19. Look for solutions rather than focusing on problems.
  20. Love hard; tell those you love how much you love them as often as possible. Hug a
    million times each day. Life is short.
  21. Try not to take things personally, even if they are personal-try not to wear your heart
    on your sleeve.
  22. Be selective as to whom you allow in your inner circle.
  23. Family is second only to God. Don’t ever put anyone or anything over your family
    except for God.
  24. God truly loves you and has your absolute best interest at heart… trust Him with
    everything- He’s got you and can be trusted!
  25. Each day is absolutely precious. Cherish the time you have and the small
    moments/memories made.
  26. Build and maintain quality relationships-Don’t push away quality individuals who truly show an
    interest in you or your family.
  27. Get into God’s Word every day and pray often.
  28. Don’t waste time on toxic people but be kind always.
  29. Do everything possible to take care of your body. You only have one.
  30. Be a lifelong learner of everything.
  31. Your wealth will not make you a better or happier person.
  32. You can do many nice and kind things for someone, and they can still end up having
    an issue with you. Do everything as unto the Lord and leave it there. Don’t expect
    anything in return.
  33. Protect your peace, even if that means distancing yourself from those who use you,
    take advantage of you, and emotionally drain you. Cut them off if you must-Protect your peace.
  34. People’s actions speak louder than their words.
  35. Invest in those who invest in you.
  36. Communication is key to any relationship.
  37. Forgive quickly, and don’t keep a record of wrong.
  38. Make sure that the people you love know that you love them.
  39. Sometimes, no matter what, some people are not going to like you.
  40. Good manners and respect go a long way.
  41. Trust has to be earned.
  42. Always make people feel comfortable.
  43. Don’t be selfish. Be generous.
  44. Be compassionate towards others.
  45. My mom used to tell me that “every girl needs a good cry every once in a while,” so
    cry, then dry your eyes, roll top your sleeves and get back at it (Millie moment iykyk).
  46. Therapy is good for your mental health.
  47. Tithe and see what happens.
  48. Be more concerned with your heart than your outward appearance.
  49. Change what you can and accept what you can not change.
  50. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.” (James 1:19)

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THIS IS US!

My Amazing Husband & I Going On 29 Years of Marriage

Forget about the TV show This is Us. My friends, my “US” is this, and “this,” right here, is most definitely and absolutely US!

We, meaning my guy and me, love hard and are both insanely emotional when it comes to each other but pretty hardcore outside of our four walls. There has never been a time when we were not in sync when it came to our parenting and our children. Maybe not always 100% in sync over our 30 years of courtship and marriage on some issues here and there, but I have to tell you, we always work it out, and admittedly, we have always had the undeniable determination to never give up on us. We believe in our crazy love, and we do the dang thang, gangster-style together, baby. That’s how we roll!

How do I emphasize the word ‘Legit’? So imagine I just elevated my voice by 30 decibels and yelled the word with a hand gesture and body language that suggests “LEGIT.” That said, Legit, we are team-us for freaking Life! Oh, just a notable side note, we absolutely killed the parenting game-at least so far…. I guess tbh the verdict is still out until my young adults finish school and grad school and fly on their own, so hit me up in a few years!

This is me and my love’s little corner on this blog to share many of our ups, downs, sideways, and trip-ups as transparent, raw, and as real as possible. Our life has been an awesome and crazy adventure so far, and we can’t wait to share a few glimpses with you all here; in love and always Cordially… stay tuned!

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